Emoji Etiquette: When You Should NOT Use Emoji

Emoji Are Great. Except When They Are Not.

I run an entire website about emoji. I genuinely believe they're one of the most interesting things to happen to human communication. And I'm here to tell you: sometimes you need to put them away.

Everybody writes about how to use emoji. Almost nobody writes about when to stop. Which is a shame, because a badly placed emoji can tank a professional relationship or make a sensitive moment feel cheap. I've seen it happen.

This isn't anti-emoji propaganda. It's about reading the room.

Professional Emails to People You Do Not Know

This is the most common mistake I see. Someone sends a cold email to a potential client, investor, or hiring manager and sprinkles in a 😊 or 👋 to seem friendly.

Problem is: you have no idea how they feel about emoji. Some professionals think they're warm and modern. Others see them and immediately file you under "not serious." When you're making a first impression, why roll those dice?

My rule: Zero emoji in first contact with someone professional. Once they send you a 😊, mirror away. Until then, let your words do the work.

Exceptions exist. Creative industries (design, social media, entertainment) tend to be more emoji-friendly even in initial communication. But even there, read the context. A cold pitch to a CMO is different from a DM to a fellow designer.

We covered more professional email scenarios in our emoji in email guide.

Serious or Sensitive Conversations

When someone shares bad news — a death in the family, a health scare, a breakup — resist the urge to respond with emoji. Even well-intentioned ones.

"I'm so sorry about your dad 😢" hits different than "I'm so sorry about your dad." And not in a good way. That crying face — even with the best intentions — can come across like you're performing sadness for an audience rather than actually feeling it. The plain text version lands harder *because* it's stripped bare.

This goes for:

• Condolences
• Apologies
• Discussions about mental health
• Breakups or relationship issues
• Medical news
• Financial hardship

One exception: If they use emoji first, that's your green light — they're setting the tone. Follow their lead. Just don't be the one to introduce emoji into a heavy conversation.

Legal and Official Documents

You'd think this goes without saying. You would be wrong.

• Contracts. A 👍 in a text message was ruled as legally binding agreement in a 2023 Canadian court case. The farmer who sent a thumbs up emoji to a grain buyer was held to a $82,000 contract. Emoji in legal contexts are genuinely dangerous because their meaning is ambiguous.
• HR communications. An emoji in a performance review or disciplinary notice undermines the seriousness of the document.
• Insurance claims. Keep them factual. No emoji.
• Academic submissions. Unless you're literally writing about emoji (like this article), leave them out of papers and theses.

Courts are still figuring out how to interpret emoji, and until they do, treat anything with potential legal weight as an emoji-free zone. Seriously. $82,000 for a thumbs up.

Cross-Cultural Communication

Our guide to emoji etiquette across cultures covers this in detail, but here are the highlights:

• 👍 is offensive in parts of the Middle East and West Africa (similar to the middle finger)
• 🤙 (call me hand) can be misread as a drinking gesture in some cultures
• 🙏 reads as prayer in some contexts and as a high-five or thank you in others
• 🦉 is associated with bad luck or death in some parts of India and the Middle East
• Color associations differ — 💛 means jealousy in some European cultures, not friendship

When you're communicating across cultural lines, especially professionally, emoji add ambiguity you don't need. Plain text is universally understood. Emoji aren't.

Job Applications and Cover Letters

Zero emoji in your resume. Zero in your cover letter. Zero in your LinkedIn messages to recruiters (at least the first one).

Strict? Maybe. But hiring managers wade through hundreds of applications. An emoji in a cover letter does stand out — just not the way you're hoping. It reads as "casual" in a context that's screaming for "professional."

Once you land the job and learn the culture? Emoji might be totally fine internally. Plenty of companies have emoji-heavy Slack cultures. But the application process isn't where you find out.

When Someone Is Angry With You

If you're in an argument or someone's upset with you, emoji can pour fuel on the fire:

• 🙂 reads as passive-aggressive in conflict contexts. It is one of the most misunderstood emoji in tense conversations. See our wiki entry on 🙂 for more on this.
• 😂 feels dismissive when someone is genuinely upset. It comes across as "I'm laughing at you."
• 👍 feels cold and dismissive as a response to someone pouring their heart out.
• Any emoji can feel like you're not taking them seriously.

When things are tense, use words. Full sentences. Say what you mean. Emoji add ambiguity, and ambiguity is gasoline on the fire of an argument.

Formal Announcements

Company-wide emails about layoffs, policy changes, organizational restructuring — these need to be emoji-free. The same goes for:

• Resignation letters
• Formal complaints
• Official statements
• Press releases
• Incident reports

The thread connecting all of these? Stakes. When what you're saying affects people's lives or livelihoods, emoji make it feel lighter than it should. No matter what you intended.

When You Are Not Sure What an Emoji Means

This sounds basic, but I see it constantly. Someone uses an emoji they think means one thing when it actually means something entirely different. Our misunderstood emoji guide covers the worst offenders:

• 💀 means "I'm dead (laughing)" to Gen Z, but older recipients may take it literally
• 🙃 can mean playful, sarcastic, passive-aggressive, or "everything is fine (it's not)" depending on context
• 🍑 and 🍆 have obvious double meanings that can make professional messages awkward
• 😏 (smirking face) reads as suggestive to most people, even if you mean it as a regular smile

Not 100% sure what an emoji means? Don't send it. Or look it up on our emoji wiki first — takes five seconds and saves you from accidentally sending your boss a 🍑.

Group Chats With Mixed Audiences

A group chat with close friends? Emoji away. A group chat that includes your boss, your partner's parents, and your college roommate? Tread carefully.

The problem: emoji you'd throw around freely with friends can land very differently with other people in the group. An inside joke emoji confuses people who aren't in on it. A casual 💀 might genuinely alarm someone who doesn't know it means "that's hilarious."

The rule: In mixed groups, default to the communication style appropriate for the most formal person in the chat. You can always be more casual in private side conversations.

So When SHOULD You Use Emoji?

Reading all this, you might think I'm saying "never use emoji." Nope. Emoji are great when:

• You are chatting with friends and family who share your communication style
• The context is casual and low-stakes
• You want to add tone to text that might otherwise read as flat
• You are on platforms designed for casual communication (WhatsApp, iMessage, Discord)
• The other person uses emoji too (mirroring is a safe strategy)
• You are doing social media marketing (where emoji are expected and effective — see our social media marketing guide)

Point is: don't banish emoji from your life. Just be thoughtful about when and where they show up. The best communicators match their tone to the situation — and sometimes the right call is to keep the emoji keyboard closed.